Sometimes I’ll type your name in the search bar just to see what comes up. Sometimes it’s new photos or things you’ve liked. I don’t do this to be nosey. Just to see what you’ve been up to.. to feel closer to you.
Today was the first time I’d done this in quite a long time.
And a video of you popped up. Something taken since the last time I saw you all those months ago. I think I watched in at least 10 times. The few seconds repeated over and over gave me a minute of you. you smiled. You laughed. I listened to it over and over. I put the phone to my chest. I closed my eyes. I pretended you were mine again for just a moment.
There was a time where that would’ve hurt. Where I would’ve cried. Today, it just made me feel good. Because I missed the sound of your laughter and because you sounded happy. That’s all I ever wanted for you.
We are completely and absolutely wrong for each other. And yet I am still utterly mad for you. I’m ok with that. I hope I always will be.
Everso SA. To the black lagoon.
LL~
The Blood & The Bones 
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