The Blood & The Bones

I did not mean for

“maybe in my next life”

to become my mantra

but here I am

going against the very religion of my upbringing and praying reincarnation exists

as if pretending this is enough for now will soften

the sharp pang of that hunger

after each disappointment quietly quitting the hunt for the more I have bared my soul to find, not even fully admitting it to myself

I do not cry out for time to move faster or anything as tragic as that

instead, I soothe myself with the thought that beyond this there is a sort of deliverance that awaits me

there is a patient sense of security in that long anticipated submission

I know would be the only way to sate me

I wont stop hoping

or giving this existence as many chances as I am given

but truly I have never stopped praying that maybe the thing I need most finds me

in the one and only life I may get

the blood

& the bones